idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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