The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize