Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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