so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I wear drunk well.
Randomize