Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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