you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
