hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
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Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
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Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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