i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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