4 words: hood of his car
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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