if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
