Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
