Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
