I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize