I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
You're like the curious george of whores
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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