The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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