I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Sorry about my life...
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
