is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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