I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize