"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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