I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
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