These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize