My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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