Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
He felt like a one man threesome
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
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