On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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