Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Also, beer. Big fan.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
