Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
