college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
bring money and cleavage
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize