Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
