real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
