they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize