My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize