Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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