I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
