I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
