Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
