id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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