I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
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