didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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