please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
