I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Randomize
