I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
