He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
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