a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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