'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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