somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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