Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
