when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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