we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
