sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
