We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
